The Federation of The Holy Caltro is a colossal, safe nation, ruled by President Boris Nelson with an even hand, and remarkable for its disturbing lack of elderly people, strictly enforced bedtime, and irreverence towards religion. The hard-nosed, humorless population of 5.657 billion Caltroans are fiercely patriotic and enjoy great social equality; they tend to view other, more capitalist countries as somewhat immoral and corrupt.

The large, corrupt, socially-minded government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Presidia. The average income tax rate is 96.2%.

The frighteningly efficient Holy Caltroan economy, worth a remarkable 1,155 trillion Denars a year, is dominated by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Information Technology, Book Publishing, and Beef-Based Agriculture. Black market activity is extensive. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an amazing 204,250 Denars, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.1 times as much as the poorest.

Protecting the land is holey work, you're never too young to learn how to lie with confidence, new "Commiserations! It's An Accident!" greetings cards for expectant mothers are selling surprisingly quickly, and politicians who vacation in East Lebatuck lose their jobs upon their return. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. The Holy Caltro's national animal is the Caltroan hamagoose and its national religion is The Great Pantheon.

The Holy Caltro is ranked 5,965^th in the world and 80^th in The East Pacific for Most Corrupt Governments, with 204.98 kickbacks per hour.